When Love Melts the Icy Closet in
Heated Rivalry
By Payam Ghassemlou MFT, SEP,
Ph.D.
Love-infused pleasure does not
come easily to everyone, especially for queer bodies. For many LGBTQ+
individuals, the capacity to feel love is shaped—and often constrained—by life
in a heteronormative, unwelcoming world, one that quietly erodes the sense of
safety the nervous system craves. When threat lingers, the body leans toward
protection—fight, flight, or freeze—leaving pleasure intertwined with love only
at the edges: fragile, deferred, and patient. It is not absent, but held at a
distance, waiting for moments of safety, recognition, and ease. Queer pleasure
often emerges in stolen fragments, in sideways time, in spaces where desire
need not explain or justify itself. The queer hockey romance series Heated
Rivalry captures this reality both on the ice and beyond, reflecting the
lives of countless queer athletes and queer people everywhere. This popular
Canadian series on Crave/HBO Max tells the story of two-star hockey players,
Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov, whose fierce rivalry on the ice conceals a
secret, passionate love that burns for years. In the shadow of competition and
public expectation, they navigate a delicate dance of desire, identity, and
self-discovery. Based on Rachel Reid’s books, the series traces their journey
from a stolen, hidden fling to a bond that runs deep, tender, and unyielding,
as they confront their careers, their reputations, and their own hearts. With a
second season on the horizon, their story continues to unfold, a testament to
love that refuses to be silenced, on the ice and beyond.
The characters, Shane and Ilya,
learn about themselves and each other through physical intimacy, making their
bodies the primary site of emotional discovery. The series uses physical
sensation, movement, and the body to communicate its narrative. Somatic
disconnect appears in early sex scenes—a "brutal quality" where
Shane's discovery of his sexuality contrasts with Ilya's more perfunctory,
physical needs. This physical tension serves as a somatic shorthand for their
lack of emotional alignment at the start of their relationship.
Pleasure infused with love
thrives when it is nurtured by safety, intimacy, and the heart, rather than
weighed down by homophobia. The story of queer men in Heated Rivalry
offers hope to those struggling to free themselves from the burdens of
homophobia, including the internalized shame of desiring homoerotic connection.
The brave men, who are pressured by the dark forces of homophobia to deny their
fundamental need for pleasure, love, and meaningful connection, find the
courage to break through icy barriers.
Having popular TV series with
positive queer representation does not mean that queerphobia or transphobia has
disappeared. Queer people still face immense challenges, especially in the wake
of rising authoritarianism in many countries, which seek to assault queer love.
As a resilient community, we continue to embrace love, pleasure, and
connection—not merely to resist homophobia, but to create space for love
itself. When love is allowed to flourish in the safety of self-acceptance, the
icy grip of prejudice begins to melt.
© Payam
Ghassemlou, MFT, Ph.D., SEP, is a psychotherapist (www.DrPayam.com), Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (www.SomaticAliveness.com), writer (https://www.drpayam.com/articles_and_book) ,and artist (https://SomaticAlivenessArt.etsy.com)
Licensed
Marriage and Family Therapist online anywhere in CA & Florida
